Absolutely Weddings’ experts answer your wedding questions. Here, wedding and events planner and 4 the People principal Jamie Landesberg gives her tips on ensuring your wedding vision isn’t hijacked by well-meaning helpers
Q: Both sets of parents want to help out with organising the wedding, but there seems to be a case of ‘too many cooks’ and we are worried that things are going to go wrong. How do we keep the peace and have the wedding we want?
A: At the risk of sounding biased, I would suggest it is time to call in a wedding planner. Clearly, your family are working with the best of intentions but there is a real danger that wrong decisions will be made or key details overlooked. You need one person you can entrust with your vision. A good wedding planner is a skilled organiser, but also a diplomat. They will be able to liaise tactfully and thoughtfully with all the other people who have a stake in making the day run smoothly. Just as importantly, they will also ensure that everyone is happy and working to the same plan.
“You need one person you can entrust with your vision – a good wedding planner is a skilled organiser, but also a diplomat”
Perhaps point out to your parents that you are concerned something will go wrong if you don’t have one person with oversight and understanding of every detail. This is rather like trying to run a company without a chief executive. A wedding planner has the expertise to manage an army of suppliers so that that nothing is overlooked and all the people you contract will know exactly what they have to deliver and when.
Remember that your wedding should be a joyous occasion for all the family, not a cause of sleepless nights. Perhaps your most persuasive argument is to remind your parents that you want them to be relaxed and ready to play their major role in the celebrations. Inevitably, that means entrusting the details to someone else.
Jamie Landesberg is principal of London-based wedding and events organiser 4 The People.